One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
