its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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