So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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