your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
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