Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
