Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
