OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
they need to just BURY HIM!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize
