Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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