you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
