I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
