have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Randomize
