I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize