She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
