So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I did not marry a roomba.
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