absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
