U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize