I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
