Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
