wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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