then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
