those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
