When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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