best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
