Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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