So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
