i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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