i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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