Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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