Midget sex pt 2 tonight
id be glad to
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
