Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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