I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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