He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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