i don't like sucking hair
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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