just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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