Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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