I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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