yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
