ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
