im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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