So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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