So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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