I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
