it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Tornado booty call.. dedication
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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