We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
