I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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