And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
