Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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