David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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