He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
