so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
